| closureANd finally there was closure, you can never befriend your past, so one just has to slowly let go
but coming out of it I started to notice things I did not appreciate before
like people actually drive their girls home when they live like.. an hours drive away
people actually do have relationships that last more than 2 years, and to them I grant my most sincere congratulations
and when being told that girls demand attention all the time, I actually believe them and marvel upon how people always text their girls, sometimes even calling them to tell them goodnight
it just seems that the older I get, my views no longer come out as black or white - just different shades of grade
I can no longer distinguish between sluts and girls with wonderful love stories
or a whipped dude from a passionate caring boyfriend
or maybe this is just where life begins - where you forget everything u learnt and trust your instinct and new experiences |
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| Desensitizationeventually you just meet someone that dumps your heart in the sewers
and for me, an overload of desensitization just hits me
and I could sense a little bit of me die within, but i can't feel it
i guess its finally time to say goodbye, see u never
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| coldI hate the cold
it makes me vulnerable - most probably because my friends are all in couples, and show up as couples at events
it tempts me into making stupid, impulsive decisions, wanting to tell people how much i miss them
when i probably only miss their company in lonely nights
or maybe it is the lonliness that makes me make these rash impulsive decisions
a good horse should never turn back for grass
at least it is what has been told to me- and i ought to believe that most people are in my best interest
but i really, really .. miss her |
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| so i thought i was goodi thought i was good at impressing parents
I thought i was good at cooking
I thought i was good at caring
I thought i was good at talking, gossiping, joking
I thought i was good at forgetting............
at least those around are supportive - do stay there and push me till I can run and be free? |
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| speakI thought I was good at talking
at least i thought I was good at socialising, and I could talk to anyone shall I tried or needed
but there are things that I want to tell her - but the words just get caught in my throat (ok my fingers)
maybe the time just isn't right for us to talk
i have just never been the patient type - or i just always want things my way
another one of those situations the world has told me to be difficult- but I never believed them
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